Democrats Looking to Move Finish Line Closer to Hillary

According to sources within the American mainstream media there could soon be a concerted effort to aid the Democratic presidential nominee ‘more than ever before’.

It’s becoming more and more obvious that she might not make it to the finish line, so we are looking at ways to make it even easier for her than we already have” said one representative for the American mainstream media, speaking on condition of anonymity. “The more it looks like we are going to have to carry her over the line the more we lose key support. We have to find a way to get here over the line, but with some semblance of subtlety.”

While it seems popular members of the mainstream media do not mind being entirely biased in favor of Mrs. Clinton, they do worry about how it could affect their careers say critics.

Just look at Dan Rather, how he stepped on his dick big time,” said a network news anchor off the record. “We have to have plausible deniability, and that means we might have to just move the finish line closer to her while she’s still ambulatory. There must be some amount of finesse used, and finesse is not a strong suit for the Democrats lately.”

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